Gangsta’s Paradise: Turkey Thug Throwdown


This morning I awoke to a familiar ruckus outside my window.  I live in a location that backs up to some protected green space near a county park.  Thus, I tend to get some interesting visitors.  A couple of years ago I had a rather heavily scented character, Fluffy the Skunk, who had several male skunk suitors.  I stomped my foot at her once while I was gardening and almost got the wrath of her tail.  So I started calling her a hussy and I think that helped to keep her away.  I occasionally see her whoring it up with the skunk of the month by the complex pool at night. That’s farther away from my building so I won’t complain.  My neighbor’s skunky marijuana-smoking has become far more offensive than Fluffy’s shenanigans.  Randy the Raccoon and his friends occasionally enjoy getting all American Pickers in the trash barrels.   Additionally, several deer, rabbits, groundhogs and a woodpecker or two reside in my neighborhood.  One evening, I even saw a coyote come out of the woods.  However, nothing really compares to what I witnessed several weeks ago on a crisp Tuesday morning at 7 AM.  In addition to the aforementioned critters, I also have turkeys…wild and crazy turkeys.  Before this little incident, I thought they were just dumb noisy birds going gobble, gobble, gobble all the day.  Oh, no.  These turkeys mean business.  They are out for blood, and by blood I mean Crips and Bloods-style turkey gang fights.

Below you will find a photo documentary of what I witnessed.  And please note that I use the tag, photography, very loosely for this post since it was early in the morning and the quality is not great.  I actually captured all of this wild turkey action through window glass and a screen.

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If these turkeys continue to fight like this, I anticipate the next hologram performance at Coachella will be our friend, Turkey-Pac Shakur.


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